show me where it hurts (will you make it okay?)
by minachandler
Summary: Set immediately post-5x17. Felicity patches Oliver up. Angst.


"John, it's - it - it - it's over for me. I don't want to do this anymore. I'm shutting everything down."

Felicity watches as Oliver winces in pain. For a second no one says anything. They all just watch him apprehensively. Then without warning his legs give way beneath him and he collapses on the floor.

Immediately John is at his side, hauling him up by the bloody shoulder, and Curtis has his other arm, pulling him to his feet once more. They drag him to the operating table, and Felicity helps, bearing the heavy weight of his legs. The three of them are panting with effort when he's finally on the table, unconscious.

For a moment none of them speak. Then Felicity finds it in her to say, "We should tell the rest of the team that Oliver's back."

"Yeah, we probably should," John says, nodding.

"What about what he said?" Curtis asks. "About - shutting everything down?"

"We can cross that bridge when we get to it," says John. "Right now we need to get him patched up."

"I'll do it," Felicity says almost instantly, and when she meets John's eyes they reach a kind of understanding that means that's all she needs to say. Wordlessly, John takes Curtis's shoulder and leads him away to the elevator, getting on the phone as he does so in order to contact Rene and the others.

Felicity watches them go, then takes a deep breath, letting her brain go into mechanical mode. She goes to the first aid cabinet, gets out the gauze and cotton wool and disinfectant and fills a bowl of water. Then she comes back to his side, and for a moment she just looks at him, at the bloody and bruised state of Oliver, her Oliver, and almost of its own accord her hand goes up to cup his cheek.

Her palm meets sharp stubble, and it's then that his eyes begin to flicker, to her relief, and then they open and stare up at her. The emptiness inside them is worse than anything Felicity could have prepared for.

"God, Oliver… what did he do to you?" she says softly, still stroking his cheek. He pants with effort, but seconds later his hand is covering hers and feebly squeezing her fingers.

"I…"

"No, it's okay," she tells him. "You don't have to tell me anything. I just - lie still, okay?"

"Okay," he says dutifully, and the fact that he doesn't even put up a fight worries her even more.

She wets the cotton wool with disinfectant, then begins the process of wiping at the first of his wounds, on his shoulder.

"That was an arrow," he says.

"Oliver, I said you didn't have to -"

"I know," he says heavily. "Just - remember that time I promised I would tell you where all my scars came from?"

She remembers. "When we were in Bali."

"Well, uh, these are going to leave scars, so…"

She doesn't have the heart to remind him that they're not together anymore, and haven't been for a long time now, so any promises he made to her when they were don't really count anymore. Instead she busies herself in wiping the disinfectant and blood from his wound before patching it up.

She moves on to the next one, the mess of his Bratva tattoo, and the charred flesh on his chest right above his heart. As gently as she can she disinfects the wound, but even so there is no mistaking the palpitations that start as he scrunches up his face with pain.

"I'm sorry," Felicity whispers.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Oliver replies instantly. "This, here? It's - all on me. And I deserve every bit of it and more."

"That's not true." She covers his tattoo in gauze and then moves on to wiping the bruises that decorate his abdomen.

"It is true. You don't realise it, but… what Chase did to me is nothing compared to what I really deserve."

"No one deserves this," Felicity says firmly. "Nothing you've done makes you deserve to be tortured by this psychopath."

"You're wrong. And you'll - realise that someday, I hope, someday soon. And then you can get as far away from me as possible."

"Oliver…" she begins to say, but when she meets his eyes she sees so much pain that she can't. She just can't argue with him any longer. "Oliver…" she says again, "I - show me where it hurts. And I'll make it okay."

"Just… tell me that you'll stay. With me. For now."

"I'm not going anywhere," Felicity says. "I promise."

"I love you," he whispers under his breath, but she's so close to him that she hears anyway. "I love you."

His eyes begin to flicker once more, and he drifts out of consciousness just as Felicity murmurs back that she loves him too.


End file.
